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Sometimes tumblr recommends posts to me from the dregs of whatever they think I might be interested in and boy let me tell you I sure am but not in the way they want
Accurate
Inaccurate when I say I’m not very political it’s because I’m not. I’m a libertarian that leans conservative but politics bore me.
The next post on this dudes blog is about how women are naturally inferior
“i’m a libertarian” right so you just a conservative that likes weed and sometimes decides not to vote
finally remembered where this quote came from: enola holmes (2020)
Anonymous asked:
I read the previous ask as librarian instead of libertarian and I was so confused like ??? what's wrong with librarians???
They eat books Carroll
Anonymous asked:
Tinder girl back again. I woke up this morning to superlikes from a libertarian (so clearly i'm doing something wrong) and 25yo dudes that look like they'd murder me in my sleep... I'm 19. WHY ya matching a girl fresh outta high school I ain't boOBOO THE FOOL YOU CREEPY MOTHERFUCKERS
They be doin that girl they be doing that
I assumed everyone knew this, but
candy desk . yeah I know you’re like “it would be stupid in a tv show if a senator famous for being a libertarian idiot whose ribs got broken in a fistfight over yard waste was infected with a virus from a one-in-a-century pandemic and continued to rifle around in the senate republican’s candy pile”. well sorry Sorkin but this is the real world and that’s just how it is
oh yeah because I forgot to mention, it was Rand Paul because of fucking course it was
also in case you didn’t know this, the US Capitol also has its own little rinky dink subway system that only they can use at it looks like this
and it looked like this in 1912 because yep it’s been there that whole time
willy wonka’s chocolate factory
article tells me there are, in fact, separate candy desks for republican and democrat senators. the republican candy desk, which is the better-known one, is operated by a singular sugar daddy, while democrats can contribute to a candy fund in order to partake of their side’s hoard
@ us senate yall really run a country like this????
Jesus Christ if you read it in a book you’d say it was too on the nose. What the fuck.
Republicans make confectioners donate all their candy to them while the democrats pitch in to pay for the candy are you fucking kidding me…I had to read the article myself and it’s somehow worse than I thought
in times like these people say things like “we need to throw it all out and start over” which is absolutely true but we also need to divest of all this whimsical shit in its entirety. if I saw, with my eyeballs, a congressperson like, vote against raising minimum wage or whatever and then take a handful of literal candy from a communal candy desk and then hop on the Magical Senator Train to Clown Town I would be in prison for murder.
I assumed everyone knew this, but
candy desk . yeah I know you’re like “it would be stupid in a tv show if a senator famous for being a libertarian idiot whose ribs got broken in a fistfight over yard waste was infected with a virus from a one-in-a-century pandemic and continued to rifle around in the senate republican’s candy pile”. well sorry Sorkin but this is the real world and that’s just how it is
oh yeah because I forgot to mention, it was Rand Paul because of fucking course it was
Politicians eating from a jelly bean trough and then getting sick from it sounds like a dril tweet
Imagine how much historical knowledge wasn’t written down because our ancestors thought: “What idiot isn’t going to know this?”
So ancient Egypt’s best friend basically was called Punt. They traded all kinds of fun stuff with them; ebony, incense, gold, silver, myrrh, leopard skins, baboons for pets… and the Egyptians wrote a lot about the land, the people living there, what their houses looked like, records of trading expeditions to there (like, robust, oceangoing ships with thousands of men); they wrote down everything imaginable about this place… except for where it actually was.
We still to this day have no geographic fix on this ancient empire’s whereabouts, because what idiot wouldn’t know, right?
Until the 1850s British condiment sets came with bottles for oil and vinegar, and three spice containers for salt, pepper and…nobody knows. Potentially mustard, but it’s just a guess because no one ever wrote it down.
And this is why historians love, really love, those incredibly dull people who write in their diary every day about what they wore and what they had for dinner and how many miles away their friend Mr So-And-So’s house is in that one village. Because they are the only ones who *do* write down what was in the third spice jar, how many miles away this now-nonexistent village was and so on. Seriously, the diaries of really dull people are HISTORICAL TREASURES OF OTHERWISE LOST MINUTIAE.
Somewhere out there there is almost certainly a diary that would expose the true contents of that third spice jar because of the one time it was low and this person had to have a quiet word with the butler or something and it was the most interesting thing that happened all week so they wrote it down. And I hope that diary is found someday because now I really want to know.
it was blurry enough i thought this was real for five seconds and i almost had a stroke