petition to be able to just turn your brain upside down and shake the stories out of it
Scientists uncover a stone with writing on it that no one can make sense of. When you see it for the first time, you can read it perfectly.
27. Astrophysicist, writer, artist. Michigan. Business inquiries: kaijunobiz@gmail.com
petition to be able to just turn your brain upside down and shake the stories out of it

Listen to This While You Read | Brief Intro Post
Not even a little bit revised and to hell with Proper Writing Form
It has been 53 years since humans abandoned their home. They’re now almost 14 trillion miles from Earth. Out here, the stars are distant and faint, leaving the Atlas to be illuminated only by the florescent lights lining its halls. This is the farthest anyone has ever strayed from home.
The Alpha Centauri system is 4.37 light years from Earth, and is the Atlas’ destination. Seven planets, three of which are habitable. It was the only logical option.
Over half a century ago they left in search of another home. They had left their home planet it waste and ruin, an unsalvageable husk of what was once their own Eden of which they were cast out. They drove themselves to the brink of extinction with wars waged by the rich where it was the poor that died.
Some had accepted the fate of the human race. Many were in denial.
But there were a few hopeful young scientists with a plan that would require all hands on deck. An engineering feat never before seen by humanity, and they put everything they had left into it.
The Atlas. Carrier of the World upon his shoulders. The last stand against total annihilation.
Extinction is the Rule. Survival is the Exception.
Scientists uncover a stone with writing on it that no one can make sense of. When you see it for the first time, you can read it perfectly.

this meme is like 2 years old please let it die
Hahah you sweet summer child:

Loss, and the meme of making fun of loss, turns ten this year
happy 13th birthday to this icon
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use code rinihime for 10% off
Please don’t remove the text (◕‿◕✿)
no but have you read the sales description
“Please Note: If your Avengers: Age of Ultron Captain America Shield Backpack is full of stuff (especially electronics), don’t throw it like Captain America does. It won’t come back to you. It will just make you sad.”
One of my favorite phrases my Creative Writing professor had for when you’re writing fantasy is ‘giving your story a Flux Capacitor’.
Because it’s not real, it doesn’t exist. But the way it’s thrown into Back to the Future, at no point does it throw the audience off or suspend any more disbelief than time travel would. You believe Doc when he says he created the Flux Capacitor - the thing that makes time travel possible, because the universe never questions him.
So it essentially means like, there are going to be elements to your universe that are just not gonna make any sense, even if you set up a whole system based on it. And the only way to make it work is completely own it. You cannot second-guess your system or else the reader will too. You can give it the strangest explanation, but write it like you own it.
Either you’ve got to follow the rules of reality and physics and shit TO THE LETTER, or you have to say “naaaaaah” and fuck off with your magic/sci-fi/whatever to have a marvelous garden party where reality isn’t invited.
gotta love that suspension of disbelief
what if instead of writing a name in the death note you had to draw that person or creature as a drawing before it died but the more sentient and smart something is the more realistic the drawing had to be so you can doodle a fly and it would die but a person would have to be pretty realistic to work but one day you’re messing around and killing seagulls at the beach because you’re a freak i guess but you go to draw one of the seagulls and it doesn’t die so you shrug because maybe its smarter than the other ones so you do it more realistically but it still doesn’t die which is weird because it should have definitely bit the dust by now so you go home and study how to draw seagulls for days and you take pictures of that specific seagull for reference until you finally go back to the beach and you sit there and you draw the most realistic depiction of a seagull anyone’s ever done and its more realistic than your other drawings even of people and as the seagull falls out of the sky, ill gotten fry in its mouth you realize you’ve just killed the smartest and and most sentient creature on the planet
07planetarium asked:
ya same but also
when i was little i wanted to be a writer so bad i would write stories and the teacher would let me read them to the class in like the 3rd grade
like god they were all super shitty but like 10 pages of writing for a 3rd grader is like,,, an ENTIRE novel lol
Anonymous asked:
LES GO
Whenever a new Arthur is chosen, its a rule that each individual member of the round table has to go in and negotiate his or her contract. Roxy goes in first, and sees Harry, missing his left eye, sitting stoically at the head of the table as if he hasn’t been dead for the past 9 months. She’s in and out fairly quickly and Eggsy is next. She can’t really give him much warning, so he walks in and sees Harry and goes stock still. Merlin has shown up around that time to make sure Eggsy doesn’t react badly and try to beat the shit out of Harry. Eggsy doesn’t really react at all, though. He walks into the meeting room and stares at Harry, his mouth opening and closing a few times as if to say something, but he doesn’t. He barely talks to Harry at all. The whole meeting is just short “yes sir” and “no sir” answers. At the end of the meeting Eggsy quickly stands up and leaves without so much as a second glance.
“That wasn’t so bad” Merlin says, trying to lighten the mood
“Oh no,” Harry says, “I’m afraid its much worse.”
Harry debates for a while whether or not he should go looking for Eggsy. After about 3 hours of pacing and looking out over the yard from his large windows, he decides to go find him. After wandering the halls, finding no sign of him, he finds his way to Merlin’s office. Without so much as looking up from whatever it is that he’s working on, Merlin tells him that Eggsy is in the gym.
Harry creeps around the gym for a while, kind of afraid to see Eggsy. If Eggsy didn’t punch him in the meeting, he figures there’s a significantly higher chance that he will now. He builds the courage to go in and he sees Eggsy at a punching bag, just wailing on it. Eggsy’s covered in sweat and missing his shirt and it makes Harry swallow but not now Harry he approaches Eggsy, who has his back to him, and Harry quietly flanks around him until he can see Eggsy’s face and he’s crying. It looks like Eggsy’s been crying for a while too because his eyes are red and there’s tear tracks down his face and it makes Harry’s heart hurt.
Eggsy finally notices Harry, he quits attacking the punching bag and they just stare at each other for a minute. Eggsy makes no move to hide the fact that he’s been crying. He doesn’t care. Eggsy backs away and goes to get his shirt that laying a few feet away and he wipes his face with it, slowly stalking up to Harry in the process.
“I fucking hate you, you know.” Eggsy says in a quiet, dangerous voice.
“I know.” Harry responds quietly. In any other situation Eggsy’s tone would send shivers up his spine, but not now. Now he has to focus.
“You said you would come back and sort everything out Harry.” Eggsy says, voice losing its bite. “You never came back.”
“I’m here now, yeah?” Harry tries. He knows it’s no good now.
“I mourned you. We all did. You died… I thought you died thinking I was a failure. That I can’t do anything. That I was a fuck up and-”
“Eggsy,” Harry cuts in, “No. I never thought that. You were never… I was upset. You were never a failure, Eggsy. You’re wonderful, you know. I’m proud of you.”
“O-Oh?” Eggsy’s face displays surprise before he hides it, but Harry saw it.
“I was always proud of you, even before V-Day.” Harry sighs. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’d like to try to earn it, if you’d let me.”
“And how would you go about doing that?” Eggsy replies, confusion and suspicion mixing in his expression.
“Would you like to go get dinner with me tonight? As a celebration, for you becoming Galahad. For me becoming Arthur. What do you think?”
Eggsy tilts his head as if in thought. “You askin’ me on a date?”
“If you’d like it to be.” Harry tries to hide his grin.
“Alright. A date it is.”
This bill would allow the Federal Trade Commission to classify conversion therapy and its practitioners as fraudulent.
<3 PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET THIS PASS <3
And (according to this article anyway) it explicitly covers conversion therapy for gender identity!
SPREAD IT MY DUDES
SPREAD IT FAR AND WIDE
:)
sirghostly asked:
jasper-rolls answered:
this is a long story but its fucking great
okay so back in 2002 a man named tim buckley decided to start up a webcomic about videogames called ctrl+alt+del. this was its first strip

fucking stunning writing, i know. now it was early days, so you could argue that tim was just getting started, but the level of humor rarely went higher than this. despite proclaiming to be about videogames, the strip tended to focus more upon the idiotic antics of ethan (guy on the right), lucas (guy on the left), lilah, a female character introduced later on and zeke, a xbox robot ethan makes later on in order to be Wacky
the “comedy” usually came from ethan pretty much being so constantly a problem that it’s a wonder any of the characters hung around him at all, let alone extended periods of time. jokes were largely a set up followed by violence as the punchline, which might not be so bad if it wasn’t tim buckley’s go to punchilne when he couldn’t think of anything actually funny (which was a lot of the time). and it continually got worse as ethan continued to constantly be a burden to all his friends, yet they inexplicably couldn’t stop liking him and bowing to his every whim, even lucas, the alleged straight man to ethan’s manchild, and lilah, introduced as a No Nonsense Girl Gamer somehow becoming his boyfriend
in case you haven’t gotten it yet, ethan is very clearly tim buckley’s self insert fantasy.
the thing is, despite the comic being very obviously bad, it was REALLY popular. like it was an absolutely huge thing. teen boys absolutely lapped up the tired jokes and sitcom cliches and thats not even getting into the absolutely DIRE chef brian comics. actually no you know what i will go into them. here

this was about 2 years after the first strip, and you can start to see the art and comedy style that would come to define ctrl+alt+del as tim buckley pretty much officially gave up on putting effort into his comic

this was literally how he put together his comics: drawing hundreds of predrawn graphics and then sticking them into 4 panels
and since ctrl+alt+del was so popular, it REALLY went to tim buckley’s head. he refused (and really still refuses) to take any kind of criticism. he became very egotistical (he sued a fan for making a flash featuring the CAD characters) and there are some reports of him doing pretty shady things over the internet
and then he hit on his greatest idea
instead of sticking with comedy in a 4 panel strip format, he decided to introduce drama. characters growing up, getting married, learning responsibility…while STILL sticking rigidly to the comics newspaper esque 4 panel format.
everyone who knew CAD was awful was already making fun of tim desperately trying to introduce pathos into his verse of xbox robots and manchild antics, but his ego was bigger than it had ever been and he couldn’t be dissuaded, and in 2008 he had the storyline in which ethan and lilah get married, and lilah becomes pregnant
and then, just to ratchet up the drama, tim buckley decided lilah would miscarry.

the internet fucking lost it. a moment intended to carry great drama and meaning instead became the funniest unintentional comedy ever written. thousands upon thousands of edits and parodies were made (a sampling can be found here. some of them are pretty gross tho, being ripped from 4chan, so be careful) and its a moment thats become heavily engrained in internet/videogame culture. its gotten to the point where the most simplistic form of representing this comic (a series of straight lines) can be immediately recognisable as making fun of this strip
i didnt explain this in the greatest way and im sure someone can do it more elegantly since i skipped a few things but really the entire history of ctrl+alt+del is an amazing chronicle of one man’s ego