ever notice how you park in a driveway but drive on a parkway and also the british nation remains proud of its legacy as the world’s most murderous empire in all of recorded history and refuses to acknowledge its massacres

Wait I got some more

- Plowing through tour groups because they’re taking up the whole sidewalk
- Idk how it happened but someone snuck an entire live fish into the fountain by the library
- All of your silverware and plateware has been stolen from the cafeteria
- “Who can sneak the biggest thing out of the caf without being caught” (currently the record is 5 whole pineapples)
- Students walking to class with a blanket tied around them like a cloak
- St Patricks day being on a week day which means you WILL witness people getting trashed in the middle of class
- a second mental breakdown
- sharing a chegg account with like 12 people
- Smoke alarm goes off in the dorms, no one actually leaves
- Your one friends roommate  who you have only interacted with when you’re both trashed. You have never seen each other while sober
- Spare bedroom in the apartment? No. It’s the weed room now.
- Playing Russian Roulette with parking enforcement because the meter spots are filled and you dont wanna go park in the commuter lot and walk a half mile to your class.
- “will the test be curved?”
- There is no such thing as friends in the laundry room. All bets are off. It’s every man for himself
- This assholes dryer has been done for 30 minutes so his shit is getting dumped on the laundry room floor
- The Sock Pile™

Look we all want a robo dog but if you kill someone with a sledgehammer to steal theirs, they are going to find you. There's no way a 75k$ dog doesn't have gps

we are killing the dog

NO.

ALL DOGS ARE PRECIOUS.

Even robot ones.

its not a dog, its a machine used and designed for police surveillance and the entire reason they made it dog shaped is so idiots like you would go "awwww robot dog how precious" instead of seeing them as the oppressive tools they are.

we're killing the fucking dog

That's not a robot dog.

It's a four-legged robot spider.

It is not a dog, a spider, a chicken, a horse, a fish, a tick, a mosquito, a tapeworm or a baby

It is a weapon

There is nothing morally wrong about breaking weapons that are hurting people for any reason other than to prevent those people from hurting others worse

the dog robots are fully capable of hurting people, and badly. failsafes that would prevent that have not been installed. the police are deploying a thing out in public that can maim anyone who touches it wrong.

look, when i was a kid i was passionately in love with the idea of robots--that humans would one day create another sort of intelligence to share our world with-- and believed very firmly that we should respect and protect all our robot friends from the start, so there would be no violent humans-against-robots revolution or anything.

anyway it turns out that the people trying to keep end-stage capitalism running are really banking on us feeling more love for the robots than for the kind of people they're going to be using the robots to oppress.

so like. maybe lets all agree right now that if a robot is being used to hurt a person, you need to smash the fucking robot. they're going to make the robots really cute. they're going to show us so many movies about how much robots need to be loved. and then they are going to use robots to hurt people.

let's try not to fall for it, okay?

And don't forget that scary af episode of Black Mirror, Metalhead. Robot dogs can fuck right off.

They created a weapon, told you to call it a friend and watched as your empathy became their trap and tool. 

Today I saw a nipple pasty chillin on the ground in the rain

God what a mood

IF 👏 A 👏 LARGE 👏 DOG 👏 THINKS 👏 IT’S 👏 A 👏 LAP 👏 DOG 👏 IT’S 👏 A 👏 LAP 👏 DOG 👏

so, this post was linked on reddit’s “tumblr circle jerk” page because there is apparently at least on person with a reddit account who thinks this is a Very Serious SJW Post about the Valid and Real Identity of Large Dogs who are trans-small dogs or something. 

I mean, people call tumblr a hellsite that believes in infinite chocolate but at least tumblr can recognize a joke about dogs.