re Pap smears: I held off on mine bc they were scary and because of dysphoria, but finally found a trans friendly gyn and she gave me some good advice. Firstly, as said, it’s only really every 3 years once you are over 21. Secondly, it’s better to learn how to handle one in a gynecology environment bc sometimes in the ER they may have to do one quickly and they don’t prep you as well. There are some exercises you can do to make it easier, if you practice squeezing your muscles beforehand (like using the muscles that you clench to stop urinating, or squeezing the muscles you use to defecate) you can get more voluntary control over them to help relax. Anyway, as someone who has trouble even using tampons, it definitely wasn’t a pleasant experience but I didn’t find it worse than going to the dentist either? So yeah, I won’t lie and say it’s painless but it’s also not so scary once you’ve done it, I def was far more afraid to get one than it actually merited. And any good doctor is gonna be very professional, so it very much doesn’t feel sexually connotated, they are really just checking your health.