I want to talk about disassociation during crisis moments and how fascinating it is to me.  Like when you’re faced with a crisis moment, a car accident, you’re in a war, you’re an EMT… you’re dealing with someone either dead or dying, etc. And somehow you’re able to dissociate yourself just enough to look at the situation clinically. You can put emotions aside and just focus on survival. I’m fascinated with that state of mind you get into.
Like. A personal example. My father and I found my grandfathers dead body, at his home in his garden. He died peacefully (but unexpectedly) of natural causes. He had been dead for a few hours, so there was no use doing CPR or anything. And there’s a moment when we’re just standing there around this dead body waiting for the ambulance to arrive and it’s… it’s awkward almost. Because what do you do in that situation? The average person just doesn’t know how to react to a dead body and that’s normal but it’s like something I’d say a good portion of the population has to encounter at some point.
And I think the key is to be honest and say ‘yeah, that’s a weird situation to be in’ because you’re in shock you’re not feeling your emotions correctly and I’m just fascinated with that state of mind.
I can see how that would be awkward. Pretty much every topic of conversation is off limits at that point. What are you gonna do, go inside and play video games? No you have to stand there and See The Body. If you’re not having Big Emotions you have to try to conjure them up because most other reactions are Wrong and Bad. Sounds very awkward. I’d also hate to be dying in a room full of living people. Same issue. You can’t just talk about the weather. You have to focus on dying and everyone having emotions about it. Very awkward. I almost tried it once and I would not recommend.
Anyways my therapist said I am dissociated most of the time so maybe that’s why I’m like this, but I would prefer to avoid situations like that and be left in peace to just be mildly content or annoyed at all times. Trying to have a real emotion is weird and cringe
Yeah I’ve also tried the dying in the hospital deal, no fun. My dad cried and that was the only time I’ve ever seen him cry and that was Not A Good Feeling. It’s very awkward because I didn’t really feel like dying? So I just. Didn’t. Especially because I was there on my own doing
