27. Astrophysicist, writer, artist. Michigan. Business inquiries: kaijunobiz@gmail.com
I shitpost when I’m feeling down
but u always shitpost
this is gonna sound p weird but for most of my elementary-high school years i dyed my hair to like, a browner, muted shade of red because for some reason i had this problem with people wanting to touch my hair and i guess it was because it was such a bright red when i was younger but i fucking hated it i hated people touching my hair and so my mom let me dye it a duller color and all the sudden ppl didn’t give a shit anymore and god it was so weird i had to hide away my fucking haircolor because ppl are fucking creeps
Before I un-muted all I thought was “Damn, that crab looks so gangster.”
how did so much happen in 6 seconds
the council evaluates this season’s orb harvest
you know, i had no idea that this thing was animatronic when i made that comment, but the fact that my shitpost caption happens to perfectly describe the sculpture even after seeing it in action unnerves me
So when are we gonna acknowledge the fact that Clickhole is just one giant shitpost machine. They’ve turned shitposting into a manufactured process. Shitposting capitalism, if you will. They’re putting us organic, mom and pop shitposters out of work.
the terrors of the past don’t stop
Not an artifact, but a warning
An ancient writ of sealing
What twisted horrors lie beyond are unfathomable by mortal minds
girlfrienb would be nice but i am not a likable person romantically speaking
im good at conversation sort of but i fear that someday ill run out and itll just be a loop of facts about hedy lamarr and bitching about modern turntable design
When in doubt just make verbal shitposts
listen. if you evre say the word shitpost again in reference to me or my dealings with humans i am going to blow up your dad with a grenade
thats the shitposting spirit
such shitpost strength here
i’m going to rip your arm off and send you back to the marshes to bleed to death
:)
