27. Astrophysicist, writer, artist. Michigan. Business inquiries: kaijunobiz@gmail.com
Plankton built his computer wife, Karen. He had to have programmed her personality. Karen is always insulting and belittling him, which means Plankton programmed her that way.
Plankton has a humiliation kink.
Plankton singlehandedly roasted an entire family on spongebob.
PLANKTON
I LOVE THIS MAN YOU DON’T EVEN KNOOOW
Plankton’s VA: “My name is Plankton. Come and eat at the Chum Bucket! Every fucking day! You come down, and we’ll shuff your face full of shit! [laughs] I’m just kidding, don’t eat at the Chum Bucket. It’s horrible. Horrible!”
Back in high school during PE the women’s track team would hold worm races and I just wanted everyone to know that and that I was oddly good at picking the fastest worms
jess tell me ur secrets. what were your criteria for worm-picking
the squigglier the worms the faster they were
Back in high school during PE the women’s track team would hold worm races and I just wanted everyone to know that and that I was oddly good at picking the fastest worms
jess tell me ur secrets. what were your criteria for worm-picking
the squigglier the worms the faster they were
JESUS??
JESUS????
i had no idea they were so frickin huge
I love them so much because they’re about as sharp as a baseball and their anatomy is ridiculous to the point of them literally being classified as plankton for years because they just sort of get blown around by the ocean and look confused, but because they lay more eggs than ANY OTHER VERTEBRATE IN EXISTENCE, evolution can’t stop them
Why is no big predator coming and gnawing on them?
Their biggest defense is that they’re massive and have super tough skin, but they do get hunted by sharks or sea lions sometimes and they just sort of float there like ‘oh bother’ as it happens
Even funnier, because they eat nothing but jellyfish they’re really low in nutritional value anyway, so they basically survive by being not worth eating because they’re like a big floating rice cracker wrapped in leather.
So basically the only reason natural selection hasn’t taken care if them is because they are the most useless fish
yes, they’ve perfected uselessness to the point of being unstoppable
a true inspiration
when jackasses say “survival of the fittest” show them this beauty
Vocal warmups.
This is basically how you break their voices down to a root noise
Voice actors are fuckin weird
Tag yourself I’m Plankton
regret.mp4
“OH RIGHT HE WAS A WRESTLER”
invader zim filmed this
Y’all these are the actors who are in the Spongebob Squarepants broadway musical that Plankton trying to knock down Spongebob
that context makes is 10000X funnier
Only on tumblr.
JESUS??
JESUS????
i had no idea they were so frickin huge
I love them so much because they’re about as sharp as a baseball and their anatomy is ridiculous to the point of them literally being classified as plankton for years because they just sort of get blown around by the ocean and look confused, but because they lay more eggs than ANY OTHER VERTEBRATE IN EXISTENCE, evolution can’t stop them
Why is no big predator coming and gnawing on them?
Their biggest defense is that they’re massive and have super tough skin, but they do get hunted by sharks or sea lions sometimes and they just sort of float there like ‘oh bother’ as it happens
Even funnier, because they eat nothing but jellyfish they’re really low in nutritional value anyway, so they basically survive by being not worth eating because they’re like a big floating rice cracker wrapped in leather.
So basically the only reason natural selection hasn’t taken care if them is because they are the most useless fish
yes, they’ve perfected uselessness to the point of being unstoppable
a true inspiration
The Great Pacific Garbage Patch, upon closer examination, was found to be comprised entirely of ocean sunfish.
“Rice Cracker wrapped in leather”
