It’s so weird being a school kid post 9/11 like I was in preschool on that day and we all got shoved into a bomb shelter the school had that hadn’t been used since the Cold War. Then Sandy Hook happened and all the schools in my county were closed down a week early for Christmas that year because of an alleged “student revolt” where kids would shoot up their schools. I, between middle and high school, a period of 7 years, was on active non-drill lockdown 6 times. Once for an armed student and the other 5 were bomb threats. Then in uni we had the real thing. A student killed his parents in the dorms and put the entire campus in lockdown for almost 24 hours until they found them. Do you have any idea the fucking fear that brings?
To have a fucking conversation with your classmates at the age of FOURTEEN about who would tackle the supposed gunman while the others escaped was fucking sickening. What was even worse was the fact that we cracked jokes about it, huddled under desks in a dark computer lab waiting for the worst. Because what the fuck else could we do.
And it’s not just 14 year olds anymore. It’s 8 year olds. It’s 6 year olds. Every time I think about that conversation we had- of who would sacrifice themselves for their classmates- it breaks my heart. And it hurts infinitely more knowing that it’s 6 year olds- fucking babies- having that conversation these days. It makes me want to puke. It made me want to puke when I was 14 having that conversation amongst my class, of who was the strongest, the fastest, who would be the most effective.
No child should ever have to have that conversation.